A man and his young wife were in divorce court, but the custody of their children posed a problem.
The mother leaped to her feet and protested to the judge that since she brought the children into this world, she should retain custody of them.
... Read more of Child custody at Free Jokes.ca
When presenting your house spirits with offerings of incense,
candles or what not you can say this little chant:
"Wraith of the house, Take heart and live,
To every chamber This light I give,
To every corner This breath I send
Approve and favor my willing hand."